Here Lizard, Lizard, Lizard

How long has it been – twelve years or something? Note to person who left me a message on Facebook six months ago – I never remember to check “other” messages, and now it won’t let me reply.

Anyway. The last two months have been…lame. So I’m going to pretend they didn’t happen, and we can just move on from there, ‘kay?

My alter-ego has completely taken over my life (the part that isn’t being taken over by my day gig – oops, I forgot – I wasn’t supposed to go there), so it’s very difficult to remember that there’s this other person named Wren Andre. Sort of like the premise for the Stephanie Meyer book “The Host“, soon to be a major motion picture. Hopefully, the first half of that film won’t be as excruciatingly boring as the book was. It got better after the first four hundred pages. Good thing I don’t give up easy.

I am feeling the need however, to hang on to a tiny part of me, and to not just completely let my Host envelop me. Especially since she spends way too much time contemplating naughty situations and positions for her characters to get in. For those who are wondering my opinion: Yes, I think Fifty Shades is going to help the genre and garner new readers. And despite the level of writing, you have to give credit: she created two characters that transcended horrible copy-editing and rampant overuse of the term “Oh my”. Isn’t that what readers want – to be engaged and lost in the lives of these fictional creatures? Most people don’t read fiction to critique it for an English Lit. class, they read it to enjoy it. Get over your jealousy people. I have. Almost.

With that said, let’s see if I can get back into some nostalgic writing here soon. That’s the plan, as I’m happy to say that my one year-anniversary happened somewhere around now, I’m pretty sure. For those of you following my pod-person’s journey, she has just completed the final line edits to her second release coming out in September, and is wrapping up the submission draft for part one in her three book series. That has been gruesome – I estimated each book would be 30 – 40, 000 words – and the first one comes in at almost 50 K. It’s not even the writing that’s the epic part – it’s the re-writes for something that long. Seriously – one of the characters somehow stole the other character’s Ford Bronco halfway in ( I accidentally switched their cars around – duh), and things like time of day (was it morning or evening?), name of a restaurant, have three or four days gone by – all of it becomes monumental the longer the thing is. No pun intended.

I’d might as well throw this in as well – my publisher has opened up a new line called “Clandestine Classics”. Remember Pride and Prejudice and Zombies? Well, take out the zombies and add in smutty scenes instead. They announced it to the world a couple of weeks ago, and the press has been crazy. Yes – my alter-ego made a proposal since they sent out the submission call only to their authors, so we’ll see. Sorry – I can’t tell you which one! Here’s a you tube video with a segment that Jimmy Kimmel live did on CC when the press broke (pretty hilarious):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5ZIlC5vZ48

Finally, the most exciting news of all: I pick up Lord Chumsley, my bearded dragon, tomorrow morning. He’s a big fella’ and will keep me company here by my computer. I shall post lizard photos soon.

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3 comments on “Here Lizard, Lizard, Lizard

  1. Wow Wren… you are living the life of a writer, everyday, and for real actual money. You’re doing what you do, interacting with your publisher, proposing new work, and generally building a following. It’s more than impressive!

    Of course I wish you could clone yourself and have Wren Andre write more blog posts about your alter-ego, and about the rest of your life… I miss seeing you on the wires, but hey, given all you have going on, it’s understandable. (I feel like I may have written what I just wrote in response to other blog posts too… if I have, lets say I’m consistently missing having you around. :-D)

    I like what you said about 50 Shades, while it may not be written very well (I’m reflecting as per your comments, I haven’t read it), it should give a boost to its genre and if the author has already made a mint on her trilogy (I’m guessing yes…) then lets hope it creates a wave of interest with a whole new crop of readers.

    Also, I haven’t read any of Stephanie Meyers work but it doesn’t surprise me that she’s got a new book that’s becoming a new movie. That money train is already chugging down the track and the publishers and movie studios want to capitalize on her name while she is still a “thing.”

    And while I am happy to know that there are large groups of readers out there and that people have not given up on reading, and while I’m also happy to know that it is still possible for some new authors to break into the business and make decent bank on their efforts, I do lament the more limited readership for short story anthologies by individual authors, and more limited readership for literary fiction…but yes, yes, I admit I lament those things for more purely selfish reasons.

    I can’t say I’m jealous of the success of Stephanie Meyers or the 50 Shades author or George RR Martin or whoever else is writing commercial fiction or genre fiction and making a great splash and selling tons of their books. I think all boats rise with the tide, even (potentially) in the little off-shoot canal where the tiny rowboats of short story writers are tied to some dilapidated docks about to fall into the water…… 🙂

  2. My husband is mildly terrified – he keeps his distance when Chumsly is out of the cage cuddling with me. This one eats veggies, fruit and crickets – plus the occasional meal worm. Reptiles in general don’t have sparkling personalities, but bearded dragons are the goofy characters of the species. He’s been handled a lot and is very mellow with people. My husband just commented a few minutes ago that right now the lizard is the most interesting thing going on in the house, and its sleeping on a rock. I’m not sure what that says about my company…
    Thank you, thank you, thank you for your kind words. I just saw the print version of the anthology show up on Amazon today, and that was very exciting. I also received two 5 star reviews there for a couple of my self-published works – total strangers – so that helps me to feel that I’m doing something right. As much as getting a publisher should be a validation, I’m writing for myself, and for readers to enjoy. That means more to me than any contract. But paying bills is good too.
    I still choose to believe that short story collections by a single author and literary fiction will thrive. They get made into movies too, and we all know that everything is more important once it becomes a film *wink*.

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